Need your help....
Okay, friends, I need to be honest about this.
I'm fighting this wicked depression, and I need your help. Can you tell me a story of a happier time we shared? Have I been kind to you in some small way? Do you have any words of encouragement for me? Have we shared a laugh?
This is the time to let me know. This black cloud in me is trying to edge out every good memory. It tells me I have always been alone, and that I always will be alone. It tells me I have no friends. It tells me that love, and peace, and joy were only temporary illusions. I know my black cloud lies, it's sneaky like that. But still it insists....
PS Yes, I have enlisted the help of the professionals (a doc, and a therapist update: a psychiatrist, some good drugs, a community psych nurse and assorted outpatient programs LOL) in this fight, just in case you were wondering. But it's not enough. I'm gonna need your help, too.
I'm fighting this wicked depression, and I need your help. Can you tell me a story of a happier time we shared? Have I been kind to you in some small way? Do you have any words of encouragement for me? Have we shared a laugh?
This is the time to let me know. This black cloud in me is trying to edge out every good memory. It tells me I have always been alone, and that I always will be alone. It tells me I have no friends. It tells me that love, and peace, and joy were only temporary illusions. I know my black cloud lies, it's sneaky like that. But still it insists....
PS Yes, I have enlisted the help of the professionals (
Labels: help
16 Comments:
Well, we didn't know each other all that well, but we did have a great working relationship and you were a big help to me with that blog work thing. And I always loved talking to you. And I still wish you were working for the same big library system with me. I hope that helps.
thx, to the woman with the coolest office and best toys!
Dear, dear Catherine. Were it not for you and your faith in me, I would never have had the guts to leave NYPL. Never. You were unwavering in your belief that I could do something else *and* be successful at it. Thank you.
Every single day I see your Wonder Wheel photo and am grateful I got to know you. (And you don't know how many compliments you get on it from people who visit us!)
I'm sure you don't remember, but I do, the very first time we met. It was at some Internet committee meeting -- I'm sure I was there for Bronx on the Web. I felt terrifically out of place, and you were nothing but incredibly nice, gracious, and welcoming to me. I have never forgotten that.
You show in your words and your actions the power of kindness and goodness. You always see the best in everyone, literally, and that's an amazing quality. Who can forget Operation Moonbeam?
Catherine, you are loved by so many. Please know that we're all with you.
Catherine, I think like Amy, you have always been someone to bring people together. If I hadn't met you--not sure about my Amy connection, without me; you'd never met your friend Carlos... It's all a circle. And not that kind of circle, you pig.
I think that you can make others think of you when poor, helpless 20 yr olds are just standing enjoying art in Chicago, speaks volumes. You make others smile, unknowningly, daily, hourly, and by the minute.
Jimbo
Catherine, remember when we went to Coney Island? And I had so much fun? Remember how windy it was on the beach and then we went to the museum with the funny mirror? And we had hotdogs?
That was a lot of fun.
-Astrid (with typing help from her mom)
thanks, guys. can you believe it? i'd completely forgotten about operation moonbeam. astrid -- hugs to you! thank you for sending me a note
Well, we have had so many occasions for laughter and so many times that I have needed your support, I could create my own blog dedicated to my love for you and our friendship. What about the night we sat and wrote personal ads together, yours was certainly more interesting than mine, remember "Martha Stewart meets...." We had so many yummy meals at your home, lots of movies, music, and debates about the way the world should work. And photos, I was to be your nude subject and all you took pictures of were my hands and feet.
Remember the hikes I tricked you into taking for miles up and down, and over water. We spent alot time together on the subway, on the phone, and eating bagels down the street from our homes. Miss you terribly and wishing back in North America ASAP. Sending BIG LOVE! -Andrea
Catherine says - "Do you have any words of encouragement for me?" Brook says "Snap the fuck out of it!"
Catherine says - "Have we shared a laugh?"
Brook says - "We just did"
I suspect the black cloud is really guilty feelings about all the cheating you do kicking my ass playing scrabulous. (by the way your move)
Is this the same woman who rode the NYC subway with all those Santas? Cool you!
Glad to hear from you, but sorry you are feeling not so well. Here is a story of a great time we had together. Remember when we went to the old Catholic Boys School on Staten Island? We climbed all through the old rooms, photographing the broken windows, the graffiti, and the weeds and ivy growing on the sides of the building. We were scared...it was a little spooky in there and not hard to imagine the place full of squatters or ghosts. The light was so beautiful, though, in some of the rooms. You took some amazing color shots of the graffiti and outside took some photos with your Holga in the bright sunshine. I, as usual, ran short of film and you loaned me a roll when mine ran out. It was exciting to sneak into such an abandoned and quiet place right in the middle of SI - and to find such mysterious signs of many layers of inhabitants and visitors.
I love you, miss you, and wish I could hug you right now! Take care. D
When the black dog bays, bite back!
I'm a little late here, but don't you remember that time we climbed up on the roof and you wanted to free the pigeons from their coop and how instead we ran back and forth across the entire block of rooftops twisting the old antennas into sculpture? Or when we shortsheeted M during the NYPL sleepover? Or the mushrooms we picked in Green Wood? You can't have forgotten you have the most beautiful hair in North America (I can't speak for the Oirish)?
PS, how come I never saw those pictures of Andrea's naked hands and feet?
now i know i'm tripping... i still have andrea's negatives... just as soon as i'm back from the loony bin they are yours, all yours! all for the price of a tasty home-cooked meal ...
c.
Hey, muchacha. Robin here. No, over here. A few of my favorite things about you: such lovely dinners with quite a number of your such lovely friends; just plain hugging you; fantasizing about half-submerging myself and my bicycle in the East River mid-winter . . . for what? for you, my dear artist friend (it's still on the ToDo list - I'd do it in any river for you); installing air conditioners in your apartment; looking at any of our Brooklyn apt walls and enjoying a C Jones original; swapping my Amazon tree stories for your fun photo shoot stories while walking in the park; and your hair, your lovely silvery hair. You've got a lot of strong oaks and flexible willows in your forest community, Catherine. Keep leaning on us. Abrazos.
Hi Sweetie..remember making my website (only one) on geocities and seeing the fluffy penguins movie...now they have it ROUGH.
Keep smiling...keep up the photography!
Hee hee hee. One more story, or some fragments...meow mix, drizzly night, streetlights, blue corduroys, plaid jacket, my first kiss in NYC - 1998.
the time i'm thinking of was back when you were living in your very first NY place. Mo and I visited and we got all tarted up to go to a manhattan bar, or show, or something .... you were totally into Rampage footwear at the time, if that helps place it. we took the train into the city and when i looked around, i realized that we had become the people that others were afraid of!
i think it was the next day that you got storm as a wee kitten.
abrazos,
xoxo h
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